The Mirror Test
When was the last time you truly looked in the mirror? I’m sure most of us glance at the mirror every day, but how many of us really see ourselves? Often, we see what we want to see. We check our appearance or make quick adjustments, but rarely do we take a moment to truly reflect on who we are and where we stand.
Do you remember setting goals at the beginning of the year? The ones that were going to make this year your year? But now, as we approach the end of the year, you find yourself with little to show for all that ambition, no accomplishments, no milestones, no sense of fulfillment. It’s easy to blame a lack of focus or diligence, but the reality is that the missing piece for many is accountability.
You see, the people who struggle to move forward aren't necessarily the least focused or hardworking, they simply lack a system of accountability. And without that system, it's easy to drift through life without ever truly measuring where you stand.
Why Accountability Matters
Accountability is the mirror that reflects our true selves, unfiltered, unbiased, and raw. It shows us exactly where we are, with all our strengths, weaknesses, blemishes, and faults. Just like a mirror doesn’t hide what’s in front of it, accountability helps us see the areas where we excel and the areas where we need to improve. And this is where growth happens.
Without accountability, it’s almost impossible to track progress. You may think you’re moving forward, but without that honest self-assessment, it’s easy to overlook gaps in your progress. When you’re accountable to yourself, you can weigh your strengths and weaknesses, learn from your mistakes, and build on your successes. This is what separates the winners from the losers.
One way to understand how accountability works is to look at exams. For students, exams are a built-in system of accountability. They don’t just test your knowledge; they force you to reflect on what you’ve learned (or failed to learn) throughout the semester. The grades you get are an honest assessment of your effort and progress. No matter how much you wish you could avoid the results, the exam holds up a mirror to your work and tells you exactly where you stand. This system helps students see how much they've truly absorbed, and how much more they need to improve.
You can create your own system of accountability. Just like an exam reveals your academic progress, you can set regular checkpoints in your life to measure how you’re advancing toward your goals. It’s not something that’s handed to you, but something you develop through intentional practice. And I want to show you a simple way to start.
The Mirror Test: A Tool for Accountability
Back in 1970, psychologist Gordon Gallup Jr. developed a concept called the Mirror Test. Originally, it was used to assess self-recognition in animals, but its core idea holds a powerful lesson for us. The test involved placing a mark on an animal’s body where it couldn’t see it directly, then observing whether the animal used a mirror to investigate and remove the mark. Animals like chimpanzees and elephants, which passed the test, demonstrated a level of self-awareness, they could recognize themselves and reflect on their state.
Now, you might be wondering: What does this test from the 70s have to do with accountability and your success? The answer is simple: self-reflection. The mirror isn’t just a tool to check your appearance; it’s a metaphor for self-awareness. Just as animals pass the test by acknowledging the mark, you can pass your own "mirror test" by recognizing where you are in life and whether you’re genuinely progressing toward your goals.
Mirrors, both literal and metaphorical, are powerful tools. Literally, they show us our physical reflection, helping us make adjustments to how we present ourselves. Metaphorically, they reflect our inner state, allowing us to assess who we are, where we’re headed, and what needs to change. The key is learning to use this metaphorical mirror to your advantage, to see yourself as you truly are, not as you wish to be.
Think about the example of exams I mentioned earlier. For students, exams are like a mirror, they don’t just measure knowledge, they reveal effort, consistency, and areas of weakness. When students sit for an exam, they’re forced to reflect on the semester: Did they study enough? Did they stay consistent? Where did they fall short? The grades they receive are an honest assessment of their work, whether they like it or not.
In the same way, life often presents us with its own “mirror tests.” These moments push us to evaluate whether we’re truly doing the work to achieve our goals or merely going through the motions. It’s not always comfortable to confront our progress, or lack thereof, but it’s necessary. Without this reflection, we risk staying in the dark about where we stand.
The good news is that you can create your own accountability system. You don’t need to wait for life’s “exams” to show you where you’re falling short. In Part 2 of this letter, I’ll share practical steps to build a personalized accountability system, one that helps you track progress and recalibrate when needed.
For now, think back to the students sitting for their exams. Just as their grades reflect their semester, what would your own “exam” reveal about your goals this year? When was the last time you truly looked in the mirror, not just to adjust your appearance, but to evaluate your progress, choices, and commitment?
The mirror test isn’t just about recognizing where you stand, it’s about doing the work to move forward.
Are you ready to face it?